I proceeded to tell her.....'I have a bunion on my right foot that is killing me....notice how I drag my left leg...that's why I carry this dam cane....I had chili last night and it is still causing me killer gas, I'm walking so slow these days I can't outrun the odor any more...excuse me...got any room spray back there?... not to mention it keeps repeating on me. My knees play tricks on me, my blood pressure is high...my diabetes has advanced and is destroying the nerves in my feet. I think I'm getting dementia...what the heck am I here for? Oh, yeah, my eyes are seeing less...my glasses are getting thicker. You know, I have this one wayward hair growing out of my left earlobe that I can't see to pluck...wait a minute, I think I have some tweezers in my bag, let me look....would you mind yanking it out for me?
Did you ask me a question?....
That is a serious pet peeve of mine...don't ask how I am because you don't know me and you don't give a tinkers dam how I am... Try going into a detailed explanation next time someone asks you that question...the look on their face is priceless!
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12 comments:
Love it! The doctor joke made my day! Still laughing.
Now, that is really funny! I could certainly give them a long tale too!!!! What a hoot.
Jas, Aes, thanks for your thoughts!
That was just "What the doctor ordered" for me Bout wet myself laughing!
Alot of truth in there too! I've done that! *Laughing*
Makes the other person sorry they even asked that question!
I'm losing body parts right and mostly left, and you wanna know how I'M DOING? Shuts 'em up every time!
DT, you're right...I haven't lost any body parts but they are sure heading way south............
LOL, SG! I have thought about answering that way before!
That cartoon is TOO funny!
Thanks!
Thanks, Flea, that is a funny cartoon.
SG!! LOL, very funny!!! You could always "pretend" to be deaf and not answer when they ask "how are you?" Works for me -- heck, I'm missing most conversations even when I can hear! LOL
SF, yea, it's a real problem but hearing is probably the only thing working correctly:)
Welllll, let me tell ya. That is funny and sometimes all too true.
Talk about "having a gas," I doubled over with laughter when I came to your chili part. That's quite a line-up you gave the poor sales clerk and an interaction she will likely never forget.
Got to hand it to you, Super Granny: you've got style, a certain unique grace, and a way with words. For sure, I'm going to follow your advice and, next time I'm asked: how are you?, I'll let 'em have it with everything from bunions to bloating and from gout to gas. Love it!
Eileen, coming from you, I must give you a heartfelt Thank You! I figure we just as well laugh as cry...
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